Speed-dating Adventurer Pillows

Have you ever tried speed-dating? Only unintentionally.

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

I DATED A GUY FROM THE FAIR, BUT . . .

'Don't let the photo put you off, it was taken when he was under the spell of a wicked witch.'

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

"I'm sorry about all this. It's my animal magnetism."

He was a nerd. But he was her nerd.

"The cheek of him! At the end of the first date, he wanted me to go to his home to roost!"

"It's an app that lets me know when I'm bored."

"And for my next trick, I will confuse general politeness for chemistry."

"And I never kiss in the first two seconds."

Would madam like me to send over the sympathy steward?

The perfect man

"Tell me about yourself. Any weird genes or anything?"

'Two Mr. Wrongs don't make a Mr. Right.'

"The worst thing about having aliens abduct you is that they say they’re going to call, but they never do."

'Speed dating really works! Our first date was Friday, we married on Saturday, and now I'm happily single again.'

"Teri tells me you're ostensibly straight.."

"Wow! That guy is REALLY good at 'Speed Dating!'"

"She said don't forget the straw."

"I'm looking for a data plan that will be constantly out of service so I can tell my dates I didn't mean to ghost them."

Single men in Tahiti

'Don't even think about it!'

"Sorry, pal. I just need to make sure she likes me for me."

"A high forhead can often be a sign that they've stolen a really big brain."

"You're not at all like your answering machine."

"On the internet nobody knows you're a dog, but in person..."

Russian Dating.

Mate Mart

'C'mon, Larry - you knew the risks when you promised to be my wingman.'

'When I said we should see other people, I didn't mean starting tonight.'

As luck would have it the hunchback's blind date turned out to be a hunchbelly!

"Is that 'good reptilian' or 'bad reptilian'?"

'But how can we be sure the dating service didn't make a mistake?'

Borrow the Bag?