Dating Escapade Adventurer Pillows

'I'm not playing hard to get. I'm a lesbian.'

And what nationality were your parents? They're poles. North or south?

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

I DATED A GUY FROM THE FAIR, BUT . . .

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

'Don't let the photo put you off, it was taken when he was under the spell of a wicked witch.'

"I'm sorry about all this. It's my animal magnetism."

"And for my next trick, I will confuse general politeness for chemistry."

"The cheek of him! At the end of the first date, he wanted me to go to his home to roost!"

The perfect man

"Tell me about yourself. Any weird genes or anything?"

'Two Mr. Wrongs don't make a Mr. Right.'

"The worst thing about having aliens abduct you is that they say they’re going to call, but they never do."

"Your profile said that you liked long walks on the beach."

'He's narrating it, I just know it.'

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

"Teri tells me you're ostensibly straight.."

Pete never wanted the fame that came with being a national symbol...he just thought it was a good way to meet girls.

"She said don't forget the straw."

Single men in Tahiti

"I thought on your profile it said you were into 'BIKING'."

Russian Dating.

"I'm looking for a data plan that will be constantly out of service so I can tell my dates I didn't mean to ghost them."

"I always say; 'You don't need to spend a lot of money to have a good time on a first date."

Mate Mart

'C'mon, Larry - you knew the risks when you promised to be my wingman.'

"Hi, I'm Miranda: I like sniffing bums, rolling about in dead things and chasing tennis balls. . ."

They all have one thing in common...they all have bad breath.

'My mother always told me if it ain't broke, date it.'

'Complements of the big smelly gentleman.'

Borrow the Bag?

'When I said we should see other people, I didn't mean starting tonight.'

'But how can we be sure the dating service didn't make a mistake?'

"That's the worst pickup line I've ever heard!"

As luck would have it the hunchback's blind date turned out to be a hunchbelly!