Dating Escapade Explorer Pillows

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

Have you ever tried speed-dating? Only unintentionally.

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

I DATED A GUY FROM THE FAIR, BUT . . .

'Don't let the photo put you off, it was taken when he was under the spell of a wicked witch.'

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

"I'm sorry about all this. It's my animal magnetism."

"The cheek of him! At the end of the first date, he wanted me to go to his home to roost!"

"And for my next trick, I will confuse general politeness for chemistry."

"I just love a nice knight out."

The perfect man

"I asked for a bottle of something that would make men drool over me. This is bourbon."

'He's narrating it, I just know it.'

'Edwards... Tamano... this isn't what I had in mind when I sent you two out on the company retreat.'

'Two Mr. Wrongs don't make a Mr. Right.'

"The worst thing about having aliens abduct you is that they say they’re going to call, but they never do."

"Don't wait too long for Mr. Right or you'll end up with Mr. What's left!"

"Teri tells me you're ostensibly straight.."

Russian Dating.

"I always say; 'You don't need to spend a lot of money to have a good time on a first date."

"She said don't forget the straw."

"I had guys chase my tail, then one day I thought, hey, dummy, get rid of the middlemen and chase your own tail!"

Mate Mart

"Sorry, pal. I just need to make sure she likes me for me."

"I'm looking for a data plan that will be constantly out of service so I can tell my dates I didn't mean to ghost them."

"Hi!- standards need lowering?"

'C'mon, Larry - you knew the risks when you promised to be my wingman.'

'Top is right! He's a scaffolder working on a tower block'

'Complements of the big smelly gentleman.'

"That's the worst pickup line I've ever heard!"

They all have one thing in common...they all have bad breath.

'My mother always told me if it ain't broke, date it.'

Borrow the Bag?

'When I said we should see other people, I didn't mean starting tonight.'

"Is that 'good reptilian' or 'bad reptilian'?"