Spam Warrior Gifts

'At 10:00 you'll be deleting spam. At 10:15 you'll be forwarding jokes. At 10:35 you'll be playing online poker. At noon...'

'Okay, sir, can you identify the spam?'

"...it's where we keep all the e-mail that gets filtered out."

Meet the People of the Internet

The eMailman's Creed

'Another one for penis enlargement.'

Whats ticking away in YOUR filing system?

'The worst thing is not having access to your e-mail.'

Bees v Wasps

"And that, gentlemen, is the Friday 4.55 pm Bad News Email Dump."

"I hit reply all too many times."

'I delete so much junk mail, my trash can icon turned into a dumpster.'

"No, he's not on any antidepressants. His euphoric mood is coming from me installing a robocall blocker on his phone."

'There's a gentleman here who's concerned because you haven't responded to not one of his 12 million email spams.'

'I've got a highspeed connection and I get spam... therefore I am!'

Ed Revere, Spam Courier

"Well that email could have been a meeting."

Your computer is not fully protected...

"Good news, your majesty. We may already be a winner."

"I hypnotized him into exercising every time he gets a spam in his inbox. He works out 50 times a day."

Spam.

"I only wish emails could deliver papercuts."

"We have to develop a new way to build our customer base. Antispam software has put a dent in our marketing strategy."

'Yes, I'm gaining weight! Deleting spam all morning makes me really hungry for lunch!'

E-mail

"Our planet no longer wants to receive email from yours."

Pandora's Inbox

'No dear, there's no post - only junk mail.'

"Your compulsive talk about crazy diets, get rich schemes, and mail order drugs -- your pacemaker's been hacked and you're spamming."

Amateur Spam.

'No, now I'm just fighting inbox inequality."

"This the nastiest email that I ever read. I want to use it as our new template."

'Oh no! We're being spammed again!'

'Good morning. You have twelve million terabyte unread e-mails.'

'He's our Spam expert!'