Soy Aficionado Gifts

"Our ancestors clawed their way to the top of the food chain for THIS??!"

Mistakes were made. We were abducted. Over the coming days, even the inattentative reader will likely notice a seeming problem with this week's comic strips: They pertain to Thanksgiving, which happened last week. What would explain this? We cannot tell a lie: We were apprehended, drugged, taken to a distant planet, served too many soy products, forced to watch reality tv, then returned disoriented and confused about the calendar. we absolutely assure you that's what happened and not, as some cy

"States of tofu"

Flying sauces.

Clown's Comedy Fart.

"When the dating agency said you were full of beans..."

"It's been 10 years Martha, why are we still eating quinoa?"

'I made it chocolate so it wouldn't show the dirt.'

"I'm now too old to produce milk, and I can't afford to retire as yet, so I've had to diversify..."

Val and Les could see a fork in the road but they weren't expecting a dip.

Maple tree donating syrup at a syrup drive clinic.

'Would you folks care for some fresh maple syrup on your pancakes?'

Source of Information

"You heard your mother. There's no need to bless the superfoods."

Armstrong, an unmarked truck just delivered a pallet of mystery meat. Turkey. It doesn't look like turkey. It looks more like some sort of dehydrated pigeon. What's it matter? If we slap it in a sandwich, smother it in "gravy," and label it "turkey," customers won't know the difference. Wait, did you just think quotes around the word gravy? "no."

'Your tomato ketchup is on it's way, Sir...'

Dijon Vu

"I do a lot for charity but I don't like to talk about it. . ."

Can I get you another coffee?

Coffee Overload: 'I'll have a low fat soy latte, no sugar, two biscotti...make that a Columbian-Kenyan bean bend...oh make it snappy, I'm in a hurry!'

'May I strongly suggest the soy burger?'

Rob and Maria dated for months, until the day he realized she was made entirely out of soy.

"Now dear...remember the sermon on PATIENCE..."

Too Much SOY

"Good King Worcestershire looked out on the feast of Stephen..."

Chef Boy Arty and the little woman who drove him to the sauce...

"It's amazing what they can do with soy, but it's just not the same."

"I wish I was special."

"Our food supervisor used to be a military cook."

I've got a problem – with me. Counseling costs extra. I always hated BMW owners. But one day I woke up and realized I drive a Saab. People who vacation in the Hamptons give me hives, but I've got a summer spot in Santa Cruz. I protested against big corporate oil companies … wearing a North Face jacket and Nike high tops! Don't you realize what I've become? I'm an upwardly mobile hippy! Death to the huppy. Hates fancy coffee drinks, loves soy milk.

1907: Thanks to his dog, Edward Fishkopp discovers the rocket drive.

'Does it come in soy lite?'

'Soy milk, soy burgers...imagine being replaced by a bean.'

(Retired) Jockeying for position.

'Niche market'