Sos Humorist Pillows

Plane Rescue

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

Indian rajah rowing elephant in a monsoon flood.

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

"Gee, thanks pal."

"Good Lord! Life on Mars...adorable life on Mars!"

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

Football Chameleon

"This cruise is getting a very stern review from me, I can tell you."

A man sees Zeus throwing lightning bolts on the balcony of his apartment.

"Wait, those crunchy, cheesy little fish thingies are free?!"

Welcome to Mauritius Home of the Dodo Burger

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

"After the drugstore, I need you to find fresh parmesan."

"The Eggsorcist"

"Is it me, or is Jasper Johns a genius?" "Über-genius, Larry. Über!"

Non-Creative Writing, Also Known as Plagiarism 101.

"I’ve heard of them barking at the moon, but never scatting at the sun."

"Don't worry, Miss. I'll soon get the hang of it."

"I see the White House didn't lower the flag to half staff."

'He doesn't like people walking in - try crawling.'

'I don't think the employees like me.'

"That's not a knife crime initiative. That's a knife crime initiative!"

'Mr. Dunbarter, your fantasy that 'greed is good' may be a case of economic insanity.'

"So, like, don't make any big plans for this weekend."

"I'm starting my own movement—Occupy Fifty-Seventh Street."

Looks Like They're Finally Renovating The Toilet

"I swear, Mr. Drumpf, I meant it in the best sense of the word." "Mr. Drumpf is a moron."

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

"[UNABLE TO PROCESS THIS IMAGE]"

German School

Plight of Decent-White-Male-Middle Class Scapgoats.

The mysterious ancient stone figures of Keister Island.

"You can't offend me. I never mix religion or politics with reality."