Senior Humorist Pillows

Husband's sudden interest in Aquafit is all because of the sexy instructor.

Old men,"I have terrible trouble with my joints..the cannabis keeps falling out."

"Six is the new five."

"The good new is I found your dentures. The bad news is the dog has a new chew toy."

"Ma'am, you don't have an ant problem. They're coffee grounds."

Wheelchair with kick-stand.

Senior Chat Rooms.

"Watch out Stan, we've got a tail-gater."

"This may be hard to believe but two SENIORS for the matinee."

"Why is there a picture of an old man in the bathroom?"

"I've thought about retiring, but there's a great deal of gravity under this chair."

Death stalks an old man

"Attention, shoppers!! We have a senior lost in the produce section!. . ."

"I used to drink to forget. Now, age-related, short-term memory loss takes care of that for me."

"You're crappin' in the closet again, Claude."

'Of course I want a short back and sides. I've only got a back and sides.'

"But, doctor, what are the advantages of living longer?"

"I see Joe Bosco passed away." "Yeah. I heard he laid down the boogie and played that funky music til he died."

Toothless Meal

Lilly was too far from the phone to complain about her new stairlift.

Adam and Eve, as old people.

Road rage on a mobility scooter.

"At my age, your legs and bowels begin to go."

"So you admit to flashing your new teeth at pretty ladies?"

A senior moment.

'If asked, we should all agree that this seminar never happened.'

David Blaine, Age 60

"Our house must be haunted. When I look in the mirror an old geezer-goat stands in front of me so I can't see myself."

'He won't start up on cold mornings.'

"What say we shake things up a bit, and go in and ask for a couple of home-pregnancy test kits."

"Yes, dear. I'm pretty sure it's 'granny panties on the inside, pants on the outside.'"

"The Doctor says it's very rate for the superannuated to get taller."

"You're getting more wrinklier, grandpa. You should drink more water."

'It's sadly ironic in a way - He can't hear the hearing aid commercials.'

"Don't let old age get you down. It's too difficult to get up again."