Soil Health Champion Gifts

I rotate my planting between watermelons and rutabagas. So you use the good crop/bad crop method.

"Now our contestant will try to guess which of you is the very last individual of your species."

Garden Shop - Top Soil, Bottom Soil (manure)

'Wash your hands, it's time for your piano lessons.'

"Bob! Your manure's here!"

'I thought this was supposed to be a holiday.'

Garden Shop: Top Soil. Bottom Soil.

'That plant food really works!'

Mother pours bubble bath into child's plastic pool

Daddy showed me why I should always wear my bicycle helmet!

-A garden uses a lot of water. -Most of it perspiration.

David Attenborough's Morning

I want a car that says 'I've arrived' but didn't use too much gas getting there.

Get back in that locker room! Go on - scat! ... Anyone else forget to wash his hands?'

Bailout, Poverty, Environment, Peace - Money for the needy.

"I say we settle around here, there's no chemical aftertaste to the soil: Must be an organic farmer..."

"They're clean Mum, I washed them yesterday."

Garden Talk - "I've decided to do some muck spreading."

"How many times have I told you kids to turn off the light when you leave a room?!"

'I know that's what your father calls it, Sweetheart...but a nicer word for it is fertilizer!'

EARTH DAY. Whatever.

The timing doesn't work for eco-club to start a garden. I have a better idea. Build a compost bin. You can recycle the school's leaves and grass clippings. You'll have good soil for a garden next spring. That's not enough time for college admissions essays. Write about the trauma of delayed gratification. Never heard of it.

Cleaner with nameplate next to Consultant Surgeon's desk.

"The nominees"

Woman disposes of partner's squash kit in hazardous waste container.

'Now that's what I call soil conservation.'

Sucking up Greenhouse gas.

Shop assistant hands over 'eco' shopping bag, saying: 'Would you like a bag for that?'

Clean air.

'That's why I like Neederman. He does the little things to help his team that don't show up in the statistics.'

"Let me know when the floor is clean enough for me to put my feet on it again."

'He may have green fingers, but he's got dirty finger nails!'

'The old man's really serious about his rooftop gardening.'

'Getting other people's toddler's leftovers on a highchair is one thing, but getting their toddler, too, is another.'

'Try to relax, Ed. It's a beach, not sandy soil.'