Soil Specialist Gifts

'That plant food really works!'

Garden Shop - Top Soil, Bottom Soil (manure)

"Bob! Your manure's here!"

"It says here that people can't live without soil. I knew it!"

Garden Shop: Top Soil. Bottom Soil.

-A garden uses a lot of water. -Most of it perspiration.

"I say we settle around here, there's no chemical aftertaste to the soil: Must be an organic farmer..."

Garden Talk - "I've decided to do some muck spreading."

"All new appliances, brand new subway tile backsplash and a unique kitchen island; notice those coconuts!"

'I know that's what your father calls it, Sweetheart...but a nicer word for it is fertilizer!'

'The good news is I just dethatched the lawn. The bad news is the lawn was nothing but thatch. . .'

"I can’t come to bed yet. I have bulbs to plant."

The timing doesn't work for eco-club to start a garden. I have a better idea. Build a compost bin. You can recycle the school's leaves and grass clippings. You'll have good soil for a garden next spring. That's not enough time for college admissions essays. Write about the trauma of delayed gratification. Never heard of it.

'Now that's what I call soil conservation.'

How's this mulch for improving my soil? Not good. It's full of toxic wood chips. They poison the dirt and don't decompose. Just what I need. Subprime loam.

User friendly soil.

'The old man's really serious about his rooftop gardening.'

'He may have green fingers, but he's got dirty finger nails!'

I'm looking for a job?

Earthly Delights Garden Centre

'Try to relax, Ed. It's a beach, not sandy soil.'

This plant is a lousy malingerer!

"You forgot to adjust your hilling discs again, didn't you?"

'Boy this is a great garden: You can taste the natural compost and fertilizer...'

Worm Appreciation Society!

'I think we found the spot where you spilled the fertilizer.'

A misery of mole hills

Worrying about college costs isn't helping. Let's get to work. I'll take that customer. Tree's Tree Nursery. That was a good start toward college! Indeed. Another 25 hydrangeas and we'll almost have enough for your first botony textbook.

"Oh, boy! My favorite! plotting soil!"

'I find that an hour in the compost pile provides my minimum daily requirement of everything.'

'So aunt Lois I hear you've developed quite a green thumb.'

Google Earth, Google Peet

Gardening Tips - allow worms to drag unwanted organic matter deep into the soil

Algebra Research Center: Come In We're Slopin'

Gardening for Beginners