Soda Explorer Gifts

Man standing in front of a vending machine for cold drinks

Diner.

"Which wine would you pair with the complimentary bread and butter?"

The Alpha Seltzer

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

'How about joining us for a soda and pizza after the ceremony?'

"Each order comes with 10 minutes of free guilt counseling."

'Coffee must wear you out. They're always sleepy when they drink it.'

"Tinnitus?"

"They're healthy? All this time, Mom said carrots and raisins were nature's candy!"

Complaints Desk

California Beverages Map

'I feel cosmopolitan tonight, Joe - Give me a scotch with an irish Chaser.'

'Beer? Wassat then?'

"What do you mean, who are my influences?"

"What wine goes well with £5.52p?"

After conquering Baked Alaska, Mount Bakewell was a piece of cake.

'All drinks are double the normal price - it makes me happy.'

"This coin must be 2,000 years old. Try not to put this one in a pop machine."

"These drinks are fun even after you've finished them."

Dutch Courage

"We also stock non-alcoholic wine" "Why?"

A man ice fishing through a hole in the ice opened using a soda can pull tab.

Man watching a huge T.V., while eating a huge box of snacks and drinking a huge can of soda

'You ate the styrofoam, and left the meringue.'

"Can you recommend a wine that tastes like a good beer?"

'This tea tastes dreadful.' - 'Tea? That's peanut butter soup.'

How to sell healthy food...

"My dad doesn't give me enough credit. He thinks if I watch TV all day long the commercials will influence everything I do."

'Don't look now, Kellmyer, But your pants are in material breach.'

Four Weddings and a Funeral and a Bag of Popcorn and a Coke