Social Navigators Pillows

"Do we kiss these people?"

"I forgot to charge him."

"Where else can you go from the security detail to owning the whole place?"

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

"It's not just him. The whole system's down."

"Honey, this is serious, we need to text."

"Sinclair's not all he's cracked up to be. His reputation exceeds him."

"It's a beautiful day. I should go for a walk. . . Oh, now my neighbors are all out there."

"Honey, why don’t you tell Tony and Karen about your microdosing-healing-group thingy or whatever the heck it is?"

"And for my next trick, I will confuse general politeness for chemistry."

"If I had known how adult her place was I would have brought nicer beer."

'Do you take this annoying woman to be your lawful wedded wife?'

"Why do I feel like your mother is going to blame this on my cleaning?"

"Uh-oh. The so-called marriage penalty."

'Now,they're going to teach you to talk, but remember, after you learn how.stay away from religion or politics.'

'I'm sorry but I need my own space.'

"No, Phil, I'm not grateful that we finally have some time alone."

"My business is less bricks and mortar and more coffee shops and laptops. I sell NFTs."

I'm filling out my myface.com and I have a question. Rudy Park, tech genius, at your service. Should I pretend to be 10,12 or 26 years old? 32? I configure browsers, not fake personas! I think I'll play for the Broncos.

"Do you, Amanda and John, promise to watch yourselves, mind your Ps and Qs, and generally step on eggshells in this marriage, in order to somehow keep it up and running for as long as possible?"

"Thanks for that."

Oh silly me, I'm trying to fix my glasses with nasal spray instead of super glue!

"It's not all your fault, some of it is my mother's!"

"This isn't working out - I'm an earthworm and you're a....are you even listening to me?"

"Oh, Johnny. I feel like I'm beginning to know you almost as well as Facebook does!"

To tweet, or not to tweet - that is the question. Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the snark and the venomous replies of anonymous jerks

"Life’s become pretty easy lately. Perhaps it’s time we shake things up by adding a dependent."

"Once we're all vaccinated, will you still want to spend every waking moment together?"

Meet the Blogger - 1-3 AM.

"At Ermbruster Academy you son will acquire indispensible life skills."

'We tried marriage your way and it didn't work. Now it's my way!'

'This is a simple proclamation-of-lack-of-interest date.'

"I don't understand... I've scientifically proven that you were wrong. How can you still be mad at me?"

'I feel like I just don't know you anymore, Richard!'

'In defense of forgetting our anniversary, I forgot we're married.'