Social Network Navigator Pillows

This could be worse than the GFC...an emotional Santa logs on and de-friends Rudolph.'

Social median

'I'm a member of the non-traditional media.'

'Not now, dear - some sexy Ukrainian girls want to meet me.'

Used to be people that lit up your life.

,Chrome Sweet Chrome

The Influencer from Hamelin

"Oh, Johnny. I feel like I'm beginning to know you almost as well as Facebook does!"

"A text is just a text, a tweet is just a tweet."

Danae's Celebrity Career: 'Whoa, what's this...another friend request?...but I've never heard of you, and a celebrity can't be associated with riff-raff, so...make friends with my delete button.'

'We met on Speed Date and broke off on Twitter.'

"You look just like your profile picture."

Bigfoot Singles - 'Currently online: 1'

Welcome to Hell: 'Be the first of your friends to like this.'

The Post-Journalism Existentialist: 'I blog, therefore I am.'

*Feels depressed about Twitter*

If you don't stop inviting me to play "Fling Your Poo," I'm unfriending you.

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

'With the increase in hacking, the I.T. department has proposed sealing all of our data in blister packs.'

Networking

Bird Tweet.

Computer Expert

Mark Zuckerberg

"It's not just him. The whole system's down."

Network Extending from Buttonhole

Newspaper suicide.

'Sir, your tweeting coach is here.'

"Sinclair's not all he's cracked up to be. His reputation exceeds him."

"It's not who you know, it's how you use them."

"I'm not spinning - I'm contextualizing."

"And for my next trick, I will confuse general politeness for chemistry."

'Mr. Smithdon's at his desk, but he's not really there....He's somewhere out there in cyberspace!'

"Honey, why don’t you tell Tony and Karen about your microdosing-healing-group thingy or whatever the heck it is?"

"It's a beautiful day. I should go for a walk. . . Oh, now my neighbors are all out there."

"If I had known how adult her place was I would have brought nicer beer."