Social Distance Navigators Pillows

"Guru? No! I came up here for social distancing but I do some stock trading on the side."

"And for my next trick, I will confuse general politeness for chemistry."

"Sinclair's not all he's cracked up to be. His reputation exceeds him."

'Modern romance'

"If I had known how adult her place was I would have brought nicer beer."

"Honey, why don’t you tell Tony and Karen about your microdosing-healing-group thingy or whatever the heck it is?"

"It's a beautiful day. I should go for a walk. . . Oh, now my neighbors are all out there."

"My business is less bricks and mortar and more coffee shops and laptops. I sell NFTs."

Do what you can to flatten the curve

'This is a simple proclamation-of-lack-of-interest date.'

"Your contact tracing revealed that you have no life."

"At Ermbruster Academy you son will acquire indispensible life skills."

"Social distancing... masks, it's difficult sometimes to know who you're talking to."

"Would it decrease my chances of getting a five star rating if I were to ask you about your political views."

'I usually don't do online dating.'

"Don't stare at his massive claw... Don't stare at his massive claw...

Dating... In the age of the coronavirus

"Cautious and considerate? Door on the left, one mask each. Selfish and ignorant? Door on the right, do as you please."

The New Normal

"Omigod, you have such a cute smile!"

A mountain guru has a sign on his mountain for safe social distancing.

Social Distancing and TV Interviews

The Land of the Uncomfortable Pause

"I thank you guys for a wonderful time—and for giving me the opportunity to access some laughter!"

'Nobody likes me. I need a media advisor.'

"You, more than anyone, should understand the concept of social distancing."

COVID 22

Ditching Masks as Lockdown Eases

"Evan short distance relationship can be difficult."

'Hey Bob, I'd like you to meet my-'

"He's nice, but not having to self isolate with nice!"

Socially Distancing Clowns