Snow Enthusiast Gifts

"Wheeeeeeee!"

Moses in Connecticut

"It's time for us to go back to Sixty-fifth and Third, Richard."

"We could reshape your nose with conventional surgery, but I'm going to suggest something radical."

"It's a poor craftsman, son, who blames his tools."

'But, Dad, all snowmen are different, because all snowflakes are different.'

'Whoa! Must have snowed two feet last night.'

"It's dislocated, alright."

"For low vitamin D, I'd recommend supplements, not sunshine."

'You win. Go out and play.'

Now, where was that chapter on stopping...

"It's true, we do have 100 words for snow, but most of them are curse words."

Snowman without coal eyes: 'I'm trying to reduce my dependence on fossil fuels.'

'Doris, I love it when we...well, you know.'

Snowman Funeral

'Maybe a massage wasn't a good idea after all.'

"I'm not going to hammer it in. You hammer it in."

M.T. accidentally triggers the predator pursuit response.

"Ernie, what are you using to repair your place?" "Ig-glue."

'Oh yeah, our people will just fall over themselves to get transferred to this office.'

R.I.P. I'd rather be skiing.

'I always thought 'bunny slope' was just an expression.'

'You sure you've done this before?'

"You ordered the Iced Coffee?"

"Okay - here they come. Remember, it's a lot like catching salmon only spit out the poles."

Skier.

'Apparently, this wind is coming in from the Arctic ...' (Polar bear flies through air.)

'Looks like an overdose.'

'Et tu, Frosty?'

"Of course, it doesn't pay as much as during the season."

Eskimo child - "Daddy! Daddy! Come and look outside, it isn't snowing!"

"Great fall, Josh!"

"Jim loves the snow, Mum, it's the only time the garden looks as tidy as next doors..."

Slush Plan.

"Client screamed, "I HATE SPRING!" and continued to have a meltdown. Diagnosis: Seasonal Affective Disorder."