Smoke Alarm Enthusiasts T-Shirts

Don't smoke in the house

'White smoke means she decided what to cook. Black smoke means it's done.'

Pipe Smoker of the Year Awards.

'It's good to see that you have a smoke detector...'

Recipe involving the switching off of the smoke alarm...

"Hickory smoke—that's what gives it that hearty Western flavor."

Merry Christmas.

"I can really taste my food since giving up smoking, so I've started again."

"I realize you don't want to miss that important business call next week, but setting your alarm to go off every 10 minutes until then is getting really annoying."

"It's time to wake up!"

"Gosh! Look what he's done to his Harry Potter books..."

House of Beans - No Smoking.

Remote control car breakdown.

"What?!"

'A lab had me smoking cigarettes for months. I'm living off my disability payments. You?'

'Your father installed a security system.'

'Damn sirens go off as soon as anyone goes near them.'

"So it's agreed then. From now on we're to do our hourse trading in partially smoke-filled rooms."

Stop Smoking Program.

Vaping cigarette

"Mr Hudson, could you kindly refrain from smoking in the brain scan machine."

"You can't smoke here but you can bring in a dirty old ash tray to smell."

'It's bad enough they make us smoke, but now we have to smoke outside!'

"He cooks under the guidance of a smoke alarm."

'I don't mind him smoking in bed. . .But not herrings.'

'No smoking near the building Higgins!'

Fire at the Bisto Factory

Break room - Smoke free, carb free.

"Bob sacrifices the first burger to the barbecue gods."

'Mind if I smoke here, too?'

Flamo the Fire Eater offering light to female bar patron

"Zumting has caused dis great trauma...any idea vhat?" "Well...we were at a red light watching the guy in the car next to us eat French fries...then...alll of a sudden, she looked right at him and he...he...lit a cigarette."

ECO gallery

'Excuse me, would you like a 'pre-coital cigarette'?'

"I'm glad you're trying to quit smoking Dr. Jekyll, but the withdrawal symptoms turn you into a completely different person!"