Slide Surfer Gifts

A woman glides down a water slide

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

Repurposing the aqueducts of Ancient Rome.

"The batteries in his TV remote died. The shock of not being able to use it for two minutes has put him in a temporary state of shock."

Stop! Stop what? Do not change the channel! Sex, death, harrowing footage of the most remarkable story you've ever seen, tattoos, rock-n-roll, action, action, action! It's all coming right up, right after this five second break for station identification. Five seconds ... You're watching Rock Television. And now back to our ... bored. Welcome to ABC. We've got thrills, action, more thrills ... Click. I've got your action right here. We've created a monster. Click click click click click cl-

'It's nothing serious. Rest is the best cure for binge shopping.'

"Well, at least it's an improvement from last night."

TV-Man

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

"You've got computer-breath."

Alien uses astronaut's visor as TV to watch news.

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

"I don't know who you are!"

Camel rider sees sign stating: The Next Mirage 16 miles.

"You need to lose 20 cable channels."

Snowboarding downhill.

'Now ask yourself Gerald, do we really need ALL these channels?'

How I met your mother

It's only a remote, dear...if you want better programs you will need a wand.

'...And as suburban sprawl continues to grow, many people are finding themselves living uncomfortably close to their wildlife neighbors.'

Early on, Billy learned the value of a good slide presentation.

'He gets confused switching channels between the World series and NFL games.'

'She got all the soap opera channels at a discount -- it's some kind of 'frequent cryer' program.'

The inventor of the Slip 'n Slide becomes a father.

Don't touch that dial! — We're experts, and we know what you should be watching!

Remote control wars.

"I never saw 'Cheers,' so I won't miss 'Cheers.'"

Sex Section in the Library

"We interrupt this rubbish to give you another chance to switch off."

Digital TV presents "It's true there really is a channel for everyone"

'500 channels...surely there must be something worth watching.'

'I hope there's something better on the 'other side'!..'

"We interrupt C.B.S.'s evening news with a special bulletin from N.B.C.!"

Hot Towel Web Service

Emergency Slide Height Limit.