Sleepwalker Gifts

Luke Sleepwalker...

Sleepwalker on treadmill

The Snooze Bar.

'Pretty please stay asleep till the morning,'

The Dangers of Not Getting Enough Sleep...

"Let's see if mom likes that super comfortable yoga mat we bought her."

'Don't worry about it Dear: You know Daddy gets grumpy if he doesn't get his daily eighteen hours of sleep...'

Women pay for one hour of uninterrupted sleep.

'Just checking that I've turned off the lights, dear!'

Drinks for the post-caffeinated economy

Insomnia Clinic - On sale here: Tapes of the Senate's longest filibusters!

"For the perfect sedative, take the juice from a bottle of whisky..."

"The sea waves on my sound machine are attracting a following."

The downside of the cupcake bed.

"You're right...it's football strategy! I think I presented our financial proposal to the youth team I coach! I must get more sleep!"

Doctor with Teddy - "Take this. It will help you sleep."

'...and that M'tud, concludes the case for the prosecution.'

'Wake up, Mr. Granger, the doctor will see you about your insomnia now.'

"Ahhhhh! Finally!" "Pssst. Don't do it. You're dreaming." "Don't go in there!"

Sleepwalking Golfer

Sinlge-white-male seeking single-female who enjoys, silence, long long walks, and scorpions.

"Before I prescribe a sleeping pill, I'd like you to try the opera."

"Right now, I'm between naps."

'This is your sleep aid. Take two of these at bedtime and stuff them up your husband's nose. That should stop his snoring.'

'How's the new insomnia pill going?'

"Honey are you asleep?" "I am now."

"Ironic, isn't it? I spend one-third of my life asleep, and the other two-thirds pretending to be awake!"

"When I can't sleep I count Powerpoint slides."

"When your memory foam mattress forgets."

'I bought a treadmill, so if he sleepwalks again I know where he is.'

Doctors to treat insomnia with sleep app rather than pills

"The Firminator. One inch of foam over cement blocks."

Hypnotist - "You are going into a deeeep sleeep"

'A cure for insomnia is a good night's sleep.'

"Can we cut down his tranquilisers please?"