Skincare Humorist Pillows

'It appears you have dry scalp.'

'It's a pimple alright. And it looks like it's ready to pop.'

"I envy you. How do you stay so slimy?"

"Sometimes I wish I could just jump into the dryer and come out wrinkle-free!"

'I Love the touch of your dry flakey skin!'

Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Sebum! I think you'll love this property on the left side of the chin. It's a wonderful place to start a pimple."

Lady Liberty's Self-Care

'The sun lounge book of melanomas.'

Anyone seen my curling tongs?

"Your eyebrows are beautiful, darling. I know you hate drawing them on."

"I just got the Google Earth app. I didn't know you had a bald spot."

'Honest, I'm not a toad - I'm a frog with a skin condition.'

Medusa, 6 P.M. Friday.

Centurion in a Shower

'Happy birthday Frank!...'

The eyebrow come over and the nose hair mustache.

Saloon Selectives

Elephant nose jobs

'BOTOX...QUICK!

'There'll be a two-hour recess while I get my hair done.'

"Well, this anti-aging cream clearly states it removes crow's feet."

"This zit is growing way out of control!"

'By accident they washed me with a conditioner!'

'There's a risk of headaches as a side effect I'm afraid.'

'She's definitely had work done.'

" ... because this job is dangerous enough without having to worry about dry, flaky skin."

Lady Macbeth in the morning

Shampoo for Medusa's scaley and slimey hair.

"I'm not really tan. I've had my head in the oven."

'When I said 'I'm breaking out,' I meant that the food here is messing with my acne.'

Arthur maintains a sense of equanimity not matter what the world situation. Mind you, the Botox helps.

'Just think, I used to pay a spa $30 a month to hang me upside down in gravity inversion boots.'

'I owe my creation to Dr. Frankenstein. But my botox, nose job and scar removal are the work of my plastic surgeon, Dr. Guida.'

"I'll bet you guys have great technology, I bet you could do great boob jobs!"

'What's it look like I'm doing? I'm applying hair tonic to my bald tire.'