Ski Aficionados Gifts

'Isn't that the ghastly couple we met last summer in Rock?'

'What do you like about winter? I like these crisp, cold morning walks in the glistening snow.' 'I like how you can keep your extra beer outside.'

They've been inseperable since the avalanche.

"Since you're skiing down to the store, we could use a whole lot more steaks."

'I love the mountains and all, but I simply can't do this....I'm just too chicken.'

Clown Skis.

'If we're going to be the sponsor of a winter Olympic even, it should be the downhill.'

'It is too snowing!'

"You have to pick the places you don't walk away from."—Joan Didion, Penny, Joan Didion.

Travel looks strong!

"Aye, but this is the Cairngorms laddie. That'll be �1.15p."

'She's not very good. She only did three revolutions and her air wasn't all that much.'

Cockroaches struggle to use the ski lift.

Skiing at Sea

"I was only kidding when I said you have ring around the collar."

'I'm detoxing - do you have any mineral water?'

A skier and a paraglider

"Bob choked on a spoon of caviar while he was on skiing vacation in St. Moritz."

'Any other husband would hire two pairs of skis.'

The Nanuit Have 2,027 Words For Snow, But, After Awhile, They Just Talk About Something Else...

Waiting for the snow to arrive in Aviemore.

Little girl skiing.

"This is a ritzy ski report - it's all fake snow."

Man chases after his skis.

"All that praying for snow finally paid off."

Ski Holidays.

Piste-side Hotel

"If you got us lost ... I am so eating you first."

Skier.

Ski lift.

'My people have 253 words for snow, but only three for sub-prime mortgage.'

"First thing, Toby—just bend your knees a little and get rid of the cigarette."

'It's almost time to get the cross-country skis out and dust them off.'

Reindeer on Skis.

Health organizations doubt the benefits of skiing holidays.