Sightseeing Skeptic Gifts

"Awesome, yes - but what's the point? I mean, aside from the travel reward points."

"Now you've seen the bust how about letting me see Naples?"

"I've got a better view on my smart phone."

"I don't like space."

Workaholic on a cruise

"My husband won't do Florida - too sunny. He's afraid of falling asleep on the beach and waking up 75-years-old."

Vertical Tower Of Pisa.

Senior Investment Analyst R.G. Thornhill glimpses the Universe in a grain of sand and is not impressed.

Rational explanations

'Just stop for a minute. Smell that pine scent. Drink in the view. I don't think we could pick a better site for our 'Mega-Mall'!'

Expert examining painting: "Ladies and gentlemen, I'm afraid it's a fake."

"We were already in this room—I remember that hideous Renoir."

"I've got about 3 more inches before I'm willing to get reading glasses."

"I just can't seem to get into the spirit of the thing."

"It's a bit overrated really isn't it?"

Never choose a vacation spot by its posters.

No caption. (Painter looks at mountain scenery but paints a cityscape.)

'I'll bet this would be more fun on a computer.'

"Welcome to the new Drone 747, remotely controlled from a rented office in Calcutta."

'Nature makes me nervous!'

You're on "Ask Sadie." What's your problem?! My family reunion is in Bermuda this year. But I hate flying. Ever since they started poking and prodding and x-raying and de-shoe-ung us, I swore I'd only go places to which I could drive. Are you using post-9/11 security enhancements as an excuse to avoid spending time with your annoying relatives? Because if so, I salute you. I will not be fondled by the TSA just to watch Aunt Bertha do the Electric Slide.

Stanley Middleton

'It's completely gutless. With all the money you save on speeding tickets it'll practically pay for itself.'

"You are either here or here."

"Sorry, I really don't believe in it...I'm a Scorpio and you know that we're naturally sceptical..."

"I hate the beach. The minute you go into the water your phone gets ruined."

'Culture Time!'

'About time... my parents are keeping me here against my will.'

"So is this the fun part, or will there be even bigger bugs sticking to my face soon?"

'I'd recommend the top deck - you can see down ladies tops better.'

'If you look carefully you'll see that all the claims are invalid except on alternate Tuesdays in June when Venus is in alignment with Mars.'

'I can't wait to get this holiday of a lifetime over so I can get back to my banal existence.'

'I told you these Time Share properties were a rip off!'

'Bob was horrified when he realised that he'd mixed up the perscriptions'

Books Self Help. Bestseller! Visualize Success. I can't see that working for me.