Sibling Of A Pet Lover Pillows

"C'mon. Get out there and go tinkle already."

Dog Hunting Trophies.

"Can I keep them? I found him on the internet?"

A large leaf falling on a dog

"What's wrong, boy? Is Timmy stuck in the well? Are zombies at your doggy door? A fire? Squirrels are holding your bone hostage? My Spotify stock just tanked?..." "He thinks he's real funny."

Skeleton playing fetch.

'Table scraps, doggie-bag goodies, dropped hot dogs, the cat's dish of food and your master's slippers.'

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

Haute Suture

"There's something about ripping the stuffing out of a toy that turns me into a wild dog. I'm afraid I actually like that feeling."

"This never happened."

'She still won't accept that she's the cat, and not the meow.'

"Never mind how I got up here....just call the fire department."

I'm beginning to regret buying that Roomba.

Christmas Pets

Dog wearing a cone

"No I said fetch , not wretch.."

A dog postal worker delivers through a letterbox in a doggy door.

Pet Entertainers

'Marm doesn't understand, 'I've got it, I've got it'.'

'@#$=%!} paparazzi!'

"She's a dachshund-lemming mix."

'Now, you're new here, but you should know the rules: I get Master's newspaper and slippers! Got that?'

Snooze buttons for cat owners

"Lori, I can’t talk right now — I’m right in the middle of updating my dog’s Facebook page."

Separation

'We had him trained to stay off the furniture, right up until we gave up.'

'It says here: while most dogs are family dogs, some dogs like one family member more. Do you think Fritzi is like that?'

'Oh that just means he wants you to rub his tummy.'

"Shhh! I'm hiding from Mistress who wants to go on a walk! It's cold and raining outside: no way I'm wearing that stupid coat again!"

"Thank goodness for pet doors because the alarm on my piddle clock was about to ring on the rug."

'A bed just isn't the same without a person in it.'

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The David Letterman Show Goes to the Dogs, Cats, Birds, Guinea Pigs...

'So... Who's chasing who?'

Cat king.