Sibling Humor Enthusiast Pillows

'Sorry, but Mum made me bring my dopey sister along.'

'Number two. That's the art that offended me.'

PET THEORIES

'Wait! Let's see if he gets up on his own.'

Bathroom Fairy

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk - it's hard to believe we're related.'

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- she's kind of a starter kit.'

"And here's one I made up called 'Mama's Last Nerve.'"

C'mon boy, speak! Speak!

'A boy? Come on, Mom, you can do better than that!'

'No, she can not come out to play again.'

Sick Exhibitionist

"I did my homework, but my little brother took it to his 'show and tell'."

'Watch out for my little brother -- he's clothing-optional.'

'Mom says she has a souffle in the oven - Does that mean I'm going to have a baby brother?'

'He doesn't really talk yet, but he does some sound bites.'

"Note cards, like a TV talk-show host! Now I can talk intelligently on any subject!"

"Don't worry, and don't listen to your brother! You can't really smell fear: it's just an expression..."

101 uses of a dead cat: ladder.

'Your brother sure ha some kind of weirdo creepy imagination.'

Trump's thoughts on 9/11

"Just be aware, once you go upright there's no going back."

"If I were your big sister, I'd show you how to act right!"

'Here's the deal: I can't dig right now and can't trust other dogs... So, there's a carrot for you each time you dig out one of my bones...'

Those bubble wrap kids.

"Baldo, can you wash the dishes for me? Or I won't help you with your homework for a month!"

Slow day at the Oval Office...

'Please leave your message after the tone...'

"Do you ever just stop and think about all the disgusting things there are to put in your mouth?"

"Mom! Andy left his shedded skin in the tub again!!"

"My sister takes a bath every day - she's a mud wrestler."

"Calm down ladies! Calm down! There is enough here for everyone so form a queue in numerical order..."