Sermon Joker Gifts

'Today's sex text is the song of Solomon.'

Two doors at the church, one labelled cry room the other snore room.

"...why a Trinity? It gets a bigger laugh that way."

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

Get crazy once in a while

'Wait a minute - How do we break a tie?'

'Never mind singing it in rap... a simple 'I do' will suffice.'

"Ok... for today I want a 500-word essay on what you know about nothing."

'You could always say the dog ate your lesson plan.'

'Want to freak her out? Stare over her shoulder without blinking for 10 minutes.'

E=Emcee Squared

Never pick a fight with a comedian.

"It's not carrots but the love of carrots that's the root of all evil."

Garden of Eden and scrumping

'I've heard all about you. Jayne says you're quite the prankster.'

"I tolerate you too. With all my heart."

Here lies BoBo the Clown

'Let it go, will you? -- That whoopie cushion incident was years ago!'

"What do you mean, you 'feel funny'?"

Toilet humour

"I'm going to need even less tuba."

"Everybody's a comedian. When I asked the clerk if he had this size bolt, he laughed and asked, 'What are you - some kind of nut?'"

No infrastructure problem here

Mr. Bubbles was beginning to regret sending his son off to clown college. 'Is that what they teach you, up at that fancy school of yours?!'

'Your Chef's Surprise, sir -- a sauteed whoopee cushion.'

A clown & his clone.

Psychobabble.

'A room with double beds, please.'

Shenanigans at the Leper Colony.

"He must like you. He wants you to share his whoopie cushion."

"Now go home and forget about your amnesia..."

Mr Kettleband's humour was described as unique.

Restroom Practical Joke.

"Hang on a second! This nutcase is allowed on the furniture, but I'm not?!"

Cloning Around