Serial Gambler Gifts

'You say that one day you win and the next day you lose? Why don't you bet on alternate days?'

"You must be cheating - no one's that lucky!"

Dog in casino.

"Things got heated with the Morgans. I may have wagered our car. You're up."

Casino. Keno. $$$. Win. Cashier. He sure wins a lot! He's "Keno Savvy."

'At 10:00 you'll be deleting spam. At 10:15 you'll be forwarding jokes. At 10:35 you'll be playing online poker. At noon...'

Wayne Krasnicky - unlucky gambler and unlucky in love.

"I think I need a professional money manager. I invest sixty five percent of my money gambling in casinos and thirty five percent I keep under the mattress."

Despite his perfect 'Poker Face'. the others always seemed to know when Toby had a good hand...

The Peacock Is Not Renowned For His Bluffing Abilities

'Will you make the final table?'

STRIP Hambone: Betting on horse racing with the company payroll

'I'll see your dirty laundry, and raise you six children.'

"I'd get out of the volatile, capricious, irritating stock market. . . but I might miss out on further gains."

I'm going to say my prayers. Should I play the same lotto numbers?

Test Today. I didn't pass the test but I did beat the point spread.

Mary's Botox injections paid for themselves in no time.

"In the ring, kid. We want you to take a fall in the ring."

'I thought she'd never leave.'

"Trevor's nose is running."

"I'm going to the house what England winning the World Cup, luckily the house doesn't belong to me."

Fantasy Football Betting Pool

'I'll take Tommy Peters to cry first, for a nickel.'

'So Bob says to me, he says, 'steroid are the only way I can compete at the pro level'. I didn't have the nerve to tell him it has no effect in poker.'

'Is that a roll of pound coins?'

"Ask your doctor if you're strong enough to day trade options."

Welcome to Las Vegas - a faith-based community.

'He's a plumber, yet you bet him he couldn't break 100, using a plunger as his putter?'

Vending machines at work: Snacks, Coffee, Glimmer of Hope

'Look at the bright side, it's better to have loved money and lost than never to have invested at all.'

'What number is the hymn 'All things bright and beautiful'?'

"Every hand I draw is a royal flush! This really is heaven!"

'Those two are going at it with hammer and tongs.'

'I'm glad there's finally a good place to go for online poker.'

"Come on, Lady. Who are you kiddin'? You're way over twenty-one."