Senior Salsa Slider T-Shirts

'The idea is to go where no man my age has gone before. I want to be the 'John Glenn' of Salsa.'

"OK. . .stain, aspirin, water tablet, B12 vitamin, and whisky."

Man pushing Euro sign up a hill.

'I'll clobber the first joker who ask me if I enjoyed my 'Winter Break'!'

'I love the mountains and all, but I simply can't do this....I'm just too chicken.'

'We are so in sync!'

"You're really not too extreme, huh?"

Four bites a second is about as fast as anyone can chew.

'So famous for her amazing fruit covered hats, Carmen Miranda's pineapple shoes were less well known.'

"Remember when we were young and could finish a round without one of us having to run off to mark his territory?"

Texas Dashboard Organizer

Medical Bling: "Help!" on a rope, Important info, O2 4U, Snazzy 3-prong

Old man plays golf, supported by his caddy and paramedic.

"Mas agua for the gringos?"

Mountain escalator.

'. . .So that's two brandies, one Gin and Tonic and two rums!'

Skiers rolling down slope in snow

'They might look sexy and seductive but all I want to do is the crossword.'

"I think I know where we went wrong with this salsa routine...bad news, my back's locked up!"

'There are only two things stopping you from being a good dancer, Mr. Jones. Your feet!'

In a shrewd business move, Hell enters the family amusement park industry.

"My chips need more salsa."

"I tell you, it's not right! How can a man be arrested for entering his own home?! It's outrageous! It's unacceptable! Something must be done!!"

Skiing

"I'm beginning to think it's salsa that's causing your mood swings."

'Growing old gracefully ... But frantically trying to keep in step with the cost of living!'

'I don't mind a medical but I think that's a bit much!

'Senor, I ask ze commandant about your last request, but he say ze salsa lessons are a no-no.'

I know you're keen to practise the new salsa routine, but I'm getting a bit jealous of the vacuum.

'And don't tread on my toes.'

"Miss Travis? Hispanic culture is about more than just casseroles and main dishes."

Hitchhiking skier