Senior Sage Gifts

'What you seem to be suffering from is longevity.'

How to identify the alarming mood swings of male menopause.

Star Trek-the Older Generation. . .

'Let's face it, Old Simkins is well past his 'best before' date...'

"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

"Remember, if I'm ever on life support unplug me... then plug me back in. See if that works."

"You seem troubled, Pastor. Is anything worrying you...I mean aside from the sins of the world, the vanity of humankind, man's inhumanity to man..."

Welcome Association of Stage Builders.

"I got all 'Cs', but I call that an 'A' report card...'A' for 'Average.'"

"Any distinguishing 'PARSONAL' characteristics?"

'Oh, yeah? -- Well, my true inner self can whip your true inner self!'

One way only.

Don't you see, Kreutzer? That's why we have all this literature. So you won't duplicate an experiment that's already been done, and there's no reason at all why you should be duplicating Smedly's experiments. After all, he shares a lab with you.

Voltaire

"Pastor, may we share a message with you about humility?"

'Do you mean 'who cares what the meaning of life is,' or that 'who cares' IS the meaning of life?'

One can hardly be expected to solve the riddle of existence without a computer

Bishop with a crozier case.

"Ralph - you'd play better golf if you had your eyes checked."

'How am I supposed to meditate with your nose whistling?'

"Is there a dramaturge in the house?"

'It's a simple two-part strategy. First, locate the hills. Then head for them.'

'You think irritable fowl syndrome is bad? Just wait until you hit menopause.'

"Do I look like a wise man to you?"

Couldn't you have used a smaller font?

Old man fighting against time with an arm wrestle.

'I'm afraid my husband will stop loving me as I get older.' - 'Mine would never do that with me. You know why, don't you. He's an antique dealer.'

"What do you mean, 'There can be no ethics without fear of God'?! Look at me - all ethical and shit!"

"The best advice I can give you is: 'Be Yourself.'"

"Rough year?" (2021 new year baby asking 2020 old year man)

'Did you spill my pint?'

The past only looks good when you're living in the present.

'Meaning of life, eh? -- Who wants to know?'

'Wh-h-hatz-u-upp, dude?'