Senior Friend Gifts

'I told you. This is NOT a good age to throw a surprise birthday.'

An old man plays a prank on the grim reaper

'I still have all my own teeth.'

Retired Elephants living with their memories - their long, detailed, complete, endless memories...

'Frankly I'm looking for a doctor I won't outlive and have to change to another.'

"You don't have OCD or ADD. You have OLD."

Old man with zimmer frame waters tree being supported by a walking stick.

A senior lady in yoga posture is watching a fitness video program on television.

"How's your memory?"

Snooze Cruise

Arrogant OAP.

'I wish i had shares in Gabardine.'

Zzzzzzzzz...

'I think it has something to do with political correctness.'

'Well, I've got my moto, my bling from E-bay, and Gerald here is my bitch. So everything's fine, you?'

Man pushing elderly lady in a wheelchair.

'He's been doing this ever since he saw the Lion King!'

'Same every Friday. Here we are rushed off our feet and we close in 10 minutes!'

'You've even lost the will to complain...'

"They've swapped the pub for staying in and taking their meds."

'I'm afraid Raymond waited a bit to long to write his memoirs.'

'You don't look 70 dear, that was some time ago. . .'

". . . and wipe your feet before you go inside."

"I hear Pete broke his hip." "Yep. Gave me a vacuum for my birthday so I put vaseline on the tips of his walker."

Festistive Devices

Help! I'm ROFL and ICGU!

Albert & Myra - The End Story

"Why bother?"

'You know you're getting old when you take longer to recover than to get tired.'

"She fell down stairs again, so this is her third hip."

"Happy birthday, dear. You still have that sparkle in your eyes!" "That sparkle burned out years ago. These are cataracts."

"I used to drink to forget. Now, age-related, short-term memory loss takes care of that for me."

"He said he doesn't want to see me in his office again..."

7 Dwarves of Retirement

"I can remember when a dollar was worth $47.32."