Senior Care Advocate Pillows

''Heaven's Waiting' Retirement Home? . . . 'We care for your parents so you don't have to.''

'Oh no! We forgot to unstrap granny before we left!'

'You seem quieter tonight. Did they give you something to help you relax?'

"Someone to see you!"

Introducing Life Alarm for people who have fallen but don't want to get up.

Sir Isaac Newton Sucks!

"Seventy-seven. How about yours."

"I'm the lot of baggage he comes with."

"Alright, Grandfather, let's check your ticker."

How to save money on geriatric care?

Getting Old Sucks: "Incontinence hotline. Can you hold please?"

"Methuselah's been retired for over 800 years, but what is he retired from?"

Angry pensioner

'He steals from the drug companies and gives to the elderly!'

Alzheimer's Amusement Park

Geriatrics struggle with a personnel shortage.

"I don't want your darn money! Get back here with that glass!"

'We put the little old lady of Threadneedle Street into a care home.'

'By 'fight the good fight' I don't mean you fight against it.'

Age Concern and Pension concerns.

Guide To Elderly Services - Care & Don't Care.

"Working with the elderly requires significant capital investment....ramps, high raise chairs, alarms."

'She'll come round to the idea of a Granny Flat eventually.'

Pension Calculation

"I wish to return this mirror - it makes me look old..."

"The best part of my days are photobombing at the retirement homes."

"I assure you that you don't have Alzheimer's because you paid my fee last week."

"He's filed a lawsuit against us for age discrimination...apparently, he can learn new tricks!"

"Relax, I've been specializing in gerontology for over six months."