Self-image Contemplator Gifts

"Ed was at that awkward in between stage of letting his hair grow out." "C'mon. C'mon. C'mon..."

Natalie contemplates Natalie attired....

"Would you mind stepping aside so I can see my reflection."

"Nice haircut."

"You're a shark! You're a killer! Nothing can stop you! Now get back in that boardroom and apologize."

Objects in mirror bear no relation to reality.

Your problems are all in your head, Al. This time you're wrong, doctor. I happen to be lying on my keys. The problem is not in my head. It's in my left buttock.

For $10 I'll show you how you're ugly.

"What does she have that I don't?"

"This tiny bald spot where your hairline used to be is so-o-o cute!"

"I'm thinking of changing my parting."

'I gave up hope of receiving a Genius Grant years ago. Now I'm basically shooting for the less impressive Mediocrity Grant.'

'I wouldn't advise you to write your autobiography. It would be a very dull read.'

"Being a celebrated artist, I do sometimes wonder why you never celebrate me."

'Cosmetic surgery.'

'I can't see anything through these ridiculous tiny slits, I'll take them.'

"Oh come now, Mr And Mrs narcissus, Have you two been fighting again?"

"If I'm coming across as shallow, uncaring and egocentric, talk to my image manager."

'What's the difference between solitude and loneliness, doctor?'

"Look, I still fit into the fitted sheet I wore when we met."

TV-Mirror.

'I'd trust you anywhere - I think!'

'The baby took some cellphone pictures of you napping!'

Seminar: Find Someone Cool to Imitate.

'If only I could accept that I can't accept being someone who finds it hard to accept acceptance from those who accept me for the person that I can't accept I really am.'

"I do feel like my old self, but I want to feel like my young self!"

"Maybe I'm just making a mountain out of a molehill. I do that a lot."

'Does my bum look big in this?'

Caterpillar Paranoia

Other People

"Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life."

“You must be this self aware and emotionally secure to go on this ride”

'I have ego issues — at least, I think it's me.'

'I never forget a face.'

'Mirror mirror on the wall who's the fairest one of all considering her age?'