Body Image Contemplator Gifts

"The vanity mirror makes me look fat."

It's not that wrinkly...what the hell are you doing? This is pathetic...

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

"Daddy, you have to flatten this curve."

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

wattle covers

"Yet she never gains an ounce."

'Do you have to use that? -- tongue depressors make me hungry.'

'My diet seems to be working great! Do you have any less relaxed jeans?'

'And she's got to have implants out to here.'

'It's the same model... he painted the second one eight months after the first painting.'

"Push harder - I still can't see the scale."

"That's a big fat lie!"

'I did have a tummy-tuck...But I opted for reconstruction surgery at the same time.'

'Ahh...now there's a man who understands women.'

Aging Problems

"Hold on, hun... I'm just saying, losing four ounces in a month is better than gaining four ounces in a month!"

"Damn. These must have shrunk in the wash." "I don't think so."

Too Skinny, Too Fat

"This tiny bald spot where your hairline used to be is so-o-o cute!"

"I can't have anything that's a food."

No matter what I do, I still look more like a 'before' picture than an 'after' picture.

Obese man using a exercise machine. His false teeth are flying out.

Me when by BDD shows up

'Oh no! You're obviously smaller than me, Joy!' 'You're not fat, 'cause those pants were tight on me too Verl.'

"It isn't fair! Why aren't thin lips fashionable?"

'You are being haunted by the spirit of a slimmer, trimmer, you.'

'You can't handle the truth.' - Scene from 'Do these pants make me look fat' starring Jack Nioholson

'You know that thin person inside you, struggling to get out? -- He seems to have gained weight, too.'

"If I had known I was going to evolve, I would have worked on my beach bod."

"You're really serious about that diet!"

"Hey, great ab!"

'I think my dieting may be getting out of hand.'

"Does this dress make my butt look big?"