Body Image Conscious Gifts

wattle covers

"You're really serious about that diet!"

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

"Daddy, you have to flatten this curve."

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

'Do you have to use that? -- tongue depressors make me hungry.'

"Yet she never gains an ounce."

'My diet seems to be working great! Do you have any less relaxed jeans?'

'And she's got to have implants out to here.'

"Push harder - I still can't see the scale."

"That's a big fat lie!"

'Ahh...now there's a man who understands women.'

'I did have a tummy-tuck...But I opted for reconstruction surgery at the same time.'

"Hold on, hun... I'm just saying, losing four ounces in a month is better than gaining four ounces in a month!"

"Damn. These must have shrunk in the wash." "I don't think so."

Aging Problems

"This tiny bald spot where your hairline used to be is so-o-o cute!"

Too Skinny, Too Fat

No matter what I do, I still look more like a 'before' picture than an 'after' picture.

"I can't have anything that's a food."

Obese man using a exercise machine. His false teeth are flying out.

'Oh no! You're obviously smaller than me, Joy!' 'You're not fat, 'cause those pants were tight on me too Verl.'

Me when by BDD shows up

"It isn't fair! Why aren't thin lips fashionable?"

'You are being haunted by the spirit of a slimmer, trimmer, you.'

'You can't handle the truth.' - Scene from 'Do these pants make me look fat' starring Jack Nioholson

"If I had known I was going to evolve, I would have worked on my beach bod."

"Does this dress make my butt look big?"

'You know that thin person inside you, struggling to get out? -- He seems to have gained weight, too.'

'I think my dieting may be getting out of hand.'

"Hey, great ab!"

'I envy your metabolism.'

'I hate her...'

Two men, one with his abdomen outside his trousers, the other with it inside. 'The Tummy Tuck.'