Body Image Awareness Gifts

'Be honest Adam, do these leaves make me look fat?'

'How much do you weigh?'

"This time they've totally gone too far."

'I'd say it's pre-liposuction.'

Size 8 or Less

"She should have taken the tissues out of the box."

"Does this dress make my butt look big?"

"Hmmm. . . I need to lose some weight. . ."

"People don't agree on PRECISELY the right language but it's generally agreed that 'humongous lardy fat lump' is probably overstepping the mark."

Woman visits a dietitian and comes out a skeleton.

'I've got a question. If your answer is 'Yes', I'll hate you. If your answer is 'No', I'll hate you, too. The question is, do you think I need a new dress because I'm looking fat in this one?'

"Does this pen make me look fat?"

The Slim Reaper

Publish Your Weight Machine for Celebrities

Dress Size Negative One.

'Your friend, I hope she's not overweight.'

Liposuction Clinic.

"Everything I eat goes to my tail."

"Developing a layer of insulating fat isn't as easy as it sounds."

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

"Daddy, you have to flatten this curve."

wattle covers

"Yet she never gains an ounce."

'Do you have to use that? -- tongue depressors make me hungry.'

'My diet seems to be working great! Do you have any less relaxed jeans?'

'And she's got to have implants out to here.'

"That's a big fat lie!"

'I did have a tummy-tuck...But I opted for reconstruction surgery at the same time.'

"Hold on, hun... I'm just saying, losing four ounces in a month is better than gaining four ounces in a month!"

Aging Problems

"Damn. These must have shrunk in the wash." "I don't think so."

"This tiny bald spot where your hairline used to be is so-o-o cute!"

Too Skinny, Too Fat