Seed Packet Skeptic Gifts

"Just a couple of ninety cent seed packets, and you can have fresh garden vegetables for heaven knows how long."

'First weeds of spring.'

"Mummy said dinner was brussels sprouts tonight. What about we drop by the park and see if the old man sitting on the bench can feed us instead?"

A gardener potting up sun loving and shade loving seedlings.

Man sees hug capsules: 'Not to be taken Orally.'

'Too much Omega 3.'

Man in radiation suit with 'Fresh Farm Produce'.

"I'd better not eat any more broccoli. I'm saving room for spiritual food."

"Sometimes I wonder about what our patients have to take."

"Is everything all right? Any reactions to the irradiated carrots, the transgenic tomatoes, or the antibiotics in the chicken?"

"Sorry, I can't tell your parents you're allergic to broccoli."

"I'm putting you on a stronger placebo."

'First of all, I'm taking you off the iron supplements.'

Way Too Genetically Engineered Chicken

'Popcorn, carrot cake, and potato chips do not count as three servings of vegetables.'

Picasso paints AND eats like a child!

'As I said, the medication won't cure you, but it will make you more comfortable for the duration.'

"What's healthy about breakfast cereals?"

"This can't even be the right planet! No one looks remotely like their online profile pics."

'I don't like to complain, but I'm getting a little tired of crudités.'

"How come there's a forbidden fruit but not a forbidden vegetable?"

'This organic seed's so much better for you than ordinary seed!'

Now With Organic Artifical Additives

"On what planet do you imagine this would be funny?"

'You're taking too much of that clamshell calcium, Margaret.'

"It's extremely rare for anyone to suffer side effects from health supplements Mr Baxter. Just how much cod liver oil have you been taking?"

'Sermon - if he wanted us to eat genetically-modified food, h would have modified them himself.'

Super and Super Duper Vitamins.

'Eat my vegetables? - I thought we were supposed to be predators!'

Smart drugs. 'Gee, duh, I don't know. Does it look like we have any in stock?'

All Organic Pork: "Naturally smoked bacon my ass."

"Janet and Bob are coming to dinner on October 6th. Better plant eight more carrots and three more potatoes this spring."

Dreaming of Spring (Onslaught of the garden catalogs).

'Pssst...hey, buddy, I got the good stuff for all your urban farming needs!'

"Gracie, eating squash is a Bermudez tradition...passed down from generation to generation! If I hated it as a kid, you can hate it as a kid, too!"