Packaging Skeptic Gifts

"High in fibre, low in salt and saturated fats. Unfortunately that's the box, the cereal is full of all sorts of crap!"

Packaging Russian Dolls

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

Bumper stickers: 'Keep on Truckin''; 'Keep on Trunkin''.

CASA DE JOY PREMIUM TEQUILA STONE BISSETT DISTILLERY CONT. NET.1000 ML 40% ALC Vol.

"How come in these days of downsizing and lower expectations, all these sneakers come with ridiculously long laces?"

CATCHY NAME

Next semester I have "The Frito-lay

"Republicans, Democrats...as long as they keep getting sick, we'll be all right."

Buy One Get One Free Sign Outside Shoe Shop

Sales Research shows it's too big for them to carry home, sir.

Access Denied!

"Multi-level marketing!"

Corporate Advertising Agency: WEEKLY SCAM MEETING

"If my mother and father had wanted to see Yves Saint Laurent's initials on my possessions, one supposes they would have named me Yves Saint Laurent."

'Special Delivery!'

"It's supposed to be some kind of aphrodisiac, but it hasn't done jack for me."

'Just wait! Someday you'll be old and corrugated!'

"Your brochure led me to believe it'd have a more temperate climate."

Too much packaging

Amazon Prime Day ~ The Aftermath

Hot Dog... Flavored meat-like substances

Frank Loved Bubblewrap

"Yes, healthcare costs too much in the U.S., but overmedicating patients is expensive."

Your weight. See, it's up not down. I told you "thin crust" pizza did not mean it would magically slim you.

"Try to find something that works like aspirin but costs much more."

"Publicly, we're still saying there are no side effects."

"This banana I bought yesterday, when I peeled it it was empty!"

"On the web it clearly said, 'one mile from the beach'."

'I know how you love empty boxes.'

"I want a campaign that shows the brand's empathetic, inclusive and caring side - or you're all fired."

'When will you learn? You're only paying for the label!'

'I'm prescribing anti-greed pills.'

But the brochures says breakfast in bed! Yes, only if you carry your bed down to the dining room!

'Customers are calling 911 about our product. They need the Jaws Of Life to get into the packaging.'