Security Satire Enthusiasts Pillows

'Did you pack your own luggage?'

Airport Security.

"Blood pressure 210/140. Heart rate 185. Steps taken 29. Sedentary 9.5 hours. Calories burned 19. You da man! Oh, and you're out of pork rinds." "Our classics TV marathon featuring 'Gunsmoke' will continue after..." "The unfitbit"

Elon Musk in fly me to the moon

"I don't think I can be truly happy unless I have more passwords."

How to create a password you can remember...

"Sale. Save 100% of your energy by closing this website. Close now. No, thanks."

"Do screen doors just keep insects out, or other things too?"

Munich Security Conference

'Hello, security.'

"She barks once for drugs, twice for weapons, and ten times for candy bars."

'You have the right to refuse the body scanner, but then I'll have to pat you down.'

Airport security - next step?

'Yes, Fluffy was a great dog and to honor her memory, we've decided to keep her name as part of our computer password.'

"Sorry Brian, bit of a rush this morning - I've left my face in the car."

'Those new airport scanners can see through clothes!'

'This will hurt you more than it will hurt me.'

'Judging by that old fashioned light bulb, your idea must be outdated.'

"No, he's not a security risk ... he just loves the pat-downs."

'The poor shlubb -- his country still only has dial-up.'

Beware of the teddy

Fabric Company: No tulle left in this vehicle overnight

"It's part of our company's new health plan. You don't ever have to leave your desk for the virtual colonoscopy..."

'I got a tool to remove malicious malware...'

'If you see a stranger, you kill him -- it's called 'Homeland Security.''

'Tower, we are ready for takeoff.'

"The truth, the whole truth...so help me, Mr Gates"

"Beware of owner."

A-1 security from crime....

Warning!! Anti-Climb Paint.

Security: Ticklish and Non-Ticklish.

Given his lack of dental insurance, Tony was initially happy with the officer of a federally subsidized cavity search.

Beware of the Dog - Leaping Over Fence