Security Procedures Gifts

'Your passport, please.'

The Anti-Agent

UK border controls relaxed.

'The fun begins when we go through airport security.'

High security Santa's grotto

'As it's your first day we're going to start you on something easy.'

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

"He's a guard dog."

"OK, you're good and just the guy we need in security."

"Someone’s in the kitchen. Did you lock up my kibble?"

The new normal

'Well, you got the dog to protect you against criminals. Perhaps now you'll have to hire a criminal to protect you from the dog.'

"I'm not sure if we're named after passwords or vice versa."

"Does anyone know where we keep the unwritten rules?"

"I see you've security marked your property."

"Check the setting. I'm sure the CIA isn't hacking into our appliances just to burn your toast."

"Yes, it's a safe: I was fed up with my winter provisions being raided by freeloaders!"

"On a positive note, he's not our boss. He's the guy who stole our boss's identity."

'Nobody ever before had took much notice of Granny's homemade flour-sack bloomers.'

Dogs stealing cat food - Vice Squad orders 'Stay!'

The Scanner Of Love.

Privacy Conference Security

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

AI Safety Officer

Moulin Rouge Security

'You can all relax and resume your game. The unattended bag discovered on the infield turned out to be the second base.'

"Beware of Don"

'The bigger they are... The harder they hit!'

"So, how was your day at work, Dear?"

"My boss had security escort me out of the office today. I'm worried this means I won't be getting a bonus."

A Little Extra

''Junk Yard Dog' just sounds so much cooler.'

Death to the Extremists

CIA, 'Confound it, Ruggles -- we're SUPPOSED to be worrywarts'

Scarecrows guarding a field