Sea Satire Lovers Gifts

Man flashing at a periscope in the middle of the ocean

'The trick to scaring surfers is to only show your dorsal fin when you surface next to them...'

"I know there's safety in numbers, but I suffer from enochlophobia: Can you help me?"

'Have you ever wondered how deep the ocean would be without sponges?'

'I'm too small for my age: I keep being rejected...'

"She's sinking alright, Captain. Even the rats are wearing life jackets!"

Exempli Gratia.

'Oh no, he's only the Health and Safety Officer.'

'I want you to go give those Herrings a warning to stay off our turf... leave this packet of chips on their doorstep.'

Fisherman catches a mine.

"But I can't help it if I smell 'Fishy'!"

Deflating Island

"Dang. . . everyehere you meet cargo ships jammed in front of the North Sea Ports!"

'You been sleep walking again?'

'Listen, yes, I'm an hermit, but a simple Hermit-Crab: I do not answer philosophical questions!'

'Ramming speed sailor.'

Fish Eye Tests.

Full use should be made of sea objects put there for your convenience.

"How weird is it?"

I can't stand it when they double park!

Sardine funeral

"A plaster on yer knee, not much of a pirate, are we?"

And today's winner of a special place in Hell is...Guys who wear bikini style bathing suits to the beach...

I think we are just too darn tasty to swim in the sea!

Oh boy, what do you think they're trying to catch with that?

Sardine Funeral.

"Who farted?"

"Dating is hard when you feel like people only like you for your legs."

'So, what'd I tell ya, huh? Just like chicken on a biscuit.'

"Your 'Low On Ink' light is lit."

Commercial Fisheries News

"I'm too old and tired to zap prey anymore: When I do, it just tickles them..."

Backwards Buccaneers

'Billy, no offense, but i'm tired of playing bumper rafts.'

"He's a fast worker, within minutes he has his tentacles all over you!"