Scuba Diver Gifts

"That, believe it or not, is also a mammal."

'Is the water cold?'

'For some strange reason, Smythe, I don't believe you're leaving work because you're not feeling well. Next time don't wear the diving gear, it's a dead giveaway.'

'We'll have lunch here and then we'll keep looking for whales.'

'The snake and plunger didn't work, so I'm going in...'

'Call it a hunch...but I don't think he feels too confident.'

'I'm out of air, the shark has my leg,I have the bends, you can be such a whiner!'

'Here we are, back safe and sound...'

Shark screaming at the sight of a diver.

Frank, this is carrying safe sex too far.

'It's not as deep on this side.'

"Hey Bob, look, a ship-wreck: let's check it out, it's like a magnet for scuba-divers..."

'Keep watching... It will start giving birth any moment now.'

If you can read this sign - you went too deep.

A cow gynaecologist.

'You must be the genius who decided to practice his scuba diving in the piranah tank at the aquarium.'

Dangerous Cave.

Espresso Decompression Stop

'Slight plumbing problem?'

"Okay, is it a real zombie or nitrogen narcosis?!"

"Apparently I'm their new leader!"

'She went down 80 years ago, and there's still a line to get to the wine bar.'

A blind Scuba-diver being lead by his Guide/Seeing Eye Fish

You know, I've heard that eating one of these things is an aphrodisiac.'

Scuba Divas.

'Now slow down for a minute...I can hear you just fine, but what does 'Gargle! Gulp, Gargle!' mean?'

Diver leaps from water like a dolphin to retrieve a fish.

'Yuck! I hate airline food.'

'I said: one of us is hallucinating!'

Fish breathing water enters dive shop.

It's called a wetsuit...Keeps you warm, even in icy-cold water...You should try one...

Frogman catches a fly with his tongue.

'Have you been under much pressure lately, Mr. Verne?'

Fishermen bragging - One has caught a diver

'OK, I got the photo. Let's release the big guy before he goes into shock.'