School Tripper Gifts

'Hall of small mammals'

"Whaddya want for nineteen mil?"

"I'm going to patronize India for my gap year, where are you going?"

"You weren't laid off...it's called Summer break."

A Day in the Country.

'When you said I would go places with the firm , sir, I was rather hoping for more than the annual outings...'

"Everybody comfortable? Got what they want? Know their place?"

The Litany Of Fun

'Y'know, this wouldn't keep happening if you learned to load your pack properly.'

The next fast train has gone.

"We're looking for a 5000 step walk."

'I spent my summer vacation NOT doing boring writing assignments.'

A politician's dream come true...

Cave lady about cave boy with big rolling stone: 'Here comes Junior with his report card.'

"I never got the chance to be homesick. You tweeted about me 20 times a day."

"I told you Science was fun!"

'Now class...' says teacher looking at fish while the children are all staring at a mermaid in the next tank.

Seaside

On a school trip to a museum, a child takes the head of a horse statue and runs through the museum with it.

A day in the country.

"No class, it isn't the world's first cell tower."

"This is too much homework, Ms. Fraily. We're only allowed one carry-on on the bus."

Now class

Abandon all hope of Wifi ye who enter here

"I'll admit, Billy Jenkins' note does look forged...but then again, he did have it notarized!"

"The vibrating is good, but can't you program them to tremble more realistically when I walk by?"

Last day of school.

"Now what can we do?"

"So Zeus was like their President Bill Clinton?"

"I've about had it with Math. Yesterday the teacher said that 3 and 4 made seven. . . today she said 5 and 2 did!"

Art Museum field trip.

Teacher looking at fish in aquarium whilst kids look at a Mermaid.

Reading the signs of change...'Looks like this is the last day of vacation, so tomorrow it's back to school, kids...'