School Squad Gifts

'You failed your Latin exam! But Sweety, it's important to learn Latin: All your friends' names have Latin roots...'

'I'm sure that you are highly qualified. It's just that we're not hiring anyone at the third grade level.'

Back to school

Cheers For The Hollyhock Middle School Chess Team

'This one's for marrying him, and this one's for raising the kids.'

You wrote a book report on a video game instruction manual?

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN!, 'Boy, talk about psychobabbl!'

Good Luck in your Exams.

"I figure I have about 20 years of school to go."

"Get up at 7; leave for school by 8; no video games until after homework is done -- how about some regulatory relief?"

Lice outbreak at Jungle High (lion with a shaved head).

'First semester, you learn the numbers. Second semester, you use them to count the days 'til school is out.'

'Don't just stand there, get into focus!'

Niche Extracurriculars

"What I miss during school holidays is not going out on strike every Friday."

"I turned five. That's why I'm here. What are you in for?"

Back to School: 'Thanks for reminding me!'

Library: The Weight lifting Section.

'I know I can train them to be thoughtful productive citizens if I can ever get past sit.'

'The good news is that all the teachers liked the weekend brainstorming retreat. The bad news is that twelve of them are out today with splitting headaches.'

Social distancing

A Lesson in Leadership: Misplacing your keys isn't a problem, unless you have to enlist the whole school's support to find them.

'What a huge disappointment. I thought French Club was about kissing!'

"This has been a productive homework session!"

'I must be growing up. I've caught myself washing my hands without being told to.'

You're awesome, Larry! When that teacher said 'there are no dumb questions'...you sure proved HER wrong!"

"I heard you may be looking for an assistant in cell growth!"

"This way, O' Brien."

'I took her to register in kindergarten, and they wanted a damage deposit.'

"Sorry dear! I'm very busy right now."

"You must be doing something wrong ... none of your work has any gold stars on it."