School Comrade Gifts

'First semester, you learn the numbers. Second semester, you use them to count the days 'til school is out.'

"Bad dog."

"Just one more thump. . . just one more thump."

'I go to St. Patrick's Church, I go to St. Patrick's School, and my name is Patrick. Is it also necessary for me to eat green food?'

'Hey, man, cool shirt.'

'My class is so large and my seat so far back, I feel like I'm taking a distance-learning course.'

'I reckon we have grounds for a libel action, don't you?.'

'Ah, Gripes, you want to discuss a raise with me, eh? Come in, sit down, make yourself comfortable!'

'It looks to me like they come in peace.'

'I'm bright enough. I just don't have the right connections.'

'How many times have I told you to stay out of the cemetery?'

'No, Mrs. Dudley! If there's a bone in a chair, that means it's reserved for Marmaduke!'

'My finger's stopped bleeding. I must have run out of blood.'

'Don't you hate undergoing peer review in these high school chemistry labs?'

Boys in the cloakroom.

That's what I call a well trained dog!!

Romeo and Juliet 2.0

'He spent yesterday being briefed on the threats from a cyber attack...'

"Oh, great. The boss is in one of his enigmatic, 'Guess what I'm thinking' moods again."

'I see you're still copying from other people's papers, Billy.'

"The kindergarteners have breached their classroom confines, and are headed this way. We'll be overrun within minutes. What should we do?"

'Quick! 'Tushy to the ground' stance!'

''My Summer Vacation †the Untold Story'....'

We'll now take a minute for silent meditation.

'If you don't stop interrupting me with your phone calls, we're never going to finish our face to face meeting.'

Henry Grumble, an editor to the bitter end.

'I like you, you've got balls.'

"Say Jeeeeeez!"

"Mr Yomp is in a big hurry, so give him 'speedy runaround number 39'..."

'We're like the canine unit, only tougher. Instead of dogs we use big, bad wolves.'

Dog, dressed as vet, is about to give cat lethal injection. Cat owner says: 'Terminal? I hope you don't mind if I get a second opinion.'

"My math teacher says I should consider becoming a teacher some day."

'HA! You are defenceless against my Churn Ray!'

"Of course I know Jim. We once built a time machine together. We go way back."