School Shenanigans Enthusiast Gifts

Student to mother: 'What a day. The health teacher left school sick, the debate team got expelled for fighting, the biology teacher dissected the school mascot, and the glee club, in general, went berserk.'

"Don't be fooled. He isn't a prince and he isn't you pal!"

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

"I'm sorry. I don't have yours. My dog ate your homework."

'In Show and Tell today, I showed my birthmark! I got expelled!'

'You're flunking me? -- What about the statute of limitations?'

"I was saying a silent prayer, but I must have dozed off and talked in my sleep."

"I really love school. There's only one problem. I think not having a college degree is holding me back."

"I figure I have about 20 years of school to go."

"I think the teacher who says that I got into trouble today is part of the fake news conspiracy."

"The principal has sat in on so many of my classes, I'm thinking of giving him the exam."

'I don't think much to faith school dinners.'

"It's Labor Day! The unofficial last day of summer!"

"But why can't I bring him to class? He's my therapy toad!"

"Finally...school starts next week."

'The dog won't eat my homework.'

'How do you like that? We just get through the alphabet and she starts hauling in the heavy artillery!'

It makes no sense. The number of books that can be stored on a small device is constantly increasing, yet school kids seem to be lugging around bigger backpacks every year!

"I'm subcontracting math, spelling and geography to my smart phone."

"Yes, next year you'll be moving from classroom to classrooms, and, no, it doesn't count as PE."

"Get real Dad, those are LAST years colors!"

"You were sent to the principal again for horsing around? That's so unfair!"

'Virgil is on the gymnastics team.'

"If it really is a smartphone, why are my grades still lousy?"

"How was first grade? I don't know yet. I spent all day in the Principal's office."

'My principal wants to see you about my principles.'

"Today in school we learned how to text our names."

'It has cut down on note-passing, glancing at fellow students' test papers and spitballs.'

Classroom.

"My dog is a finicky eater. He refuses to eat my homework."

High school sophomore Kyle Rimnard tests his theory that cafeteria meatloaf cures acne.

'I know it hasn't any wheels...They're still in the pencil.

"I can't believe school ends in three months! Sometimes I wish it would never end. But I guess endings make you appreciate the present."

'How do you like school?'

"Timmy, thank you for your science report..."Yawning is Contagious.'"