School Antics Enthusiast Gifts

Paul Revere circa 3rd grade.

'Love-rat Kyle's dumped me for a slapper from Year 2.'

Practical Joke in the Classroom.

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

"Have you been eating the paste again, Todd?"

'In Show and Tell today, I showed my birthmark! I got expelled!'

"I'm sorry. I don't have yours. My dog ate your homework."

Li'l Bill meets destiny.

'You're flunking me? -- What about the statute of limitations?'

"I figure I have about 20 years of school to go."

"I think the teacher who says that I got into trouble today is part of the fake news conspiracy."

"I really love school. There's only one problem. I think not having a college degree is holding me back."

The Ekert Saga: 'Ah, another week of school begins...might as well try to make the most of it!...You're crampin' my style, Ekert.'

"It's Labor Day! The unofficial last day of summer!"

'I don't think much to faith school dinners.'

"The principal has sat in on so many of my classes, I'm thinking of giving him the exam."

"Finally...school starts next week."

"But why can't I bring him to class? He's my therapy toad!"

'The dog won't eat my homework.'

'How do you like that? We just get through the alphabet and she starts hauling in the heavy artillery!'

"Yes, next year you'll be moving from classroom to classrooms, and, no, it doesn't count as PE."

It's all gravy.

"I'm subcontracting math, spelling and geography to my smart phone."

"I turned five. That's why I'm here. What are you in for?"

"Exactly how long were you home schooled?"

"Let's just say my teacher and I agreed to disagree."

"Get real Dad, those are LAST years colors!"

"You were sent to the principal again for horsing around? That's so unfair!"

'Virgil is on the gymnastics team.'

"If it really is a smartphone, why are my grades still lousy?"

'I wish you would come to me first with your grievances, instead of going directly to the United Nations Committee on Human Rights.'

'My principal wants to see you about my principles.'

"Today in school we learned how to text our names."

'It has cut down on note-passing, glancing at fellow students' test papers and spitballs.'

It could be worse -- there could be 35 teachers for every student