School Report Grappler Gifts

The cake was great and the icecream was delicious, but deep down inside, he knew that some day his parents would discover that 'f' wasn't for 'fantastic', and then none of it would be worth it.

The Jeopardy of Progress

"I like going to school...and I like coming home from school. It's all the stuff in the middle that gives me trouble."

Pinocchio's Second Realization

'I got an alleged C on my criminal law test.'

"God works in mysterious ways."

"How would I explain the 'D' in debate class? Probably not very well."

"I just feel like I'm constantly disappointing parents everytime I appear on report cards."

Parent Involvement Tip #1

Grim Reapers sitting their 'Finals'.

"Getting good grades isn't enough, son. You also need to bring in new clients."

'I bet those are the accident reports.'

"I think she marked yours in blue pen because she used up all her red on mine."

"I'm doing just fine ??" as long as no one decides to do a background check."

Man crushing grapes with flippers.

'Sorry professor, my mind was some other place.'

'I would've done better in geography, but the test on Australia boomeranged.'

"When I hear the word mathematics I immediately think of three things. Boring and useless."

'If I had Doppler, it would be predicting a storm when my parents see this grade on my meteorology test.'

'Mum, Dad, I've downgraded my academic forecast.'

"Those image resolutions are crystal clear, but it's my New Year's resolutions that are getting pretty fuzzy."

"Look, I got a good grade because I worked hard. It's like riding a bike...stay in your seat, keep moving forward and you'll reach your goal. Unless you hit a lipstick case dropped in the middle of the road."

'If my grades don't improve, I don't know what'll happen. Maybe they'll offer me a buyout.'

'You're not achieving the bench marks.'

'We need to start working more closely to try to improve these grades. Do you have my office number?'

"You're a veteran, right grandpa? Maybe you can help me with my school report...what was General George Washington really like?"

'This wouldn't have happened if you'd saved to send me to a private school.'

"I must be out of memory"

"'C-minus'? -- I'd like to speak to your supervisor!"

"There is no complaint department, Robert."

'I'm very creative and creative people are not afraid to fail.'

"Turns out Mommy's life is one big long report, sweeitie."

"Look, Dad, I can explain my report card... Maybe I'm not the best student in the world...maybe I'll never be as good as you want me to be... Maybe..."

'Didn't some smart guy say, 'Ignorance is bliss?''

"Actually, Dad, the 'D' in math is from when you helped me with my homework."