School Open Day Gifts

'LOVELY school. But where's the library?' 'What's a library?'

School Open.

Kid at bus stop to kid: 'Needless to say, I cured my Mom of her home-schooling kick.'

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

My First Camera

'Well, Tommy, you've grown a foot since the last time I saw you!'

"So, what's gonna be your favorite class?"

'I'm not happy with his latest school photo.'

Today we learned to count to one.

"I know! I know! I K-n-o-w!. . . Um, what was the question?"

Face painting by numbers.

"I lost my taste for his homework when it came burned on a CD."

"You're never a superhero in your own backyard."

'A dog ate my homework.'

'I'd like to challenge the test.'

'I don't like the sound of the engine.'

"The day at school? Oh, you know, the usual psychological and educational stew."

"I'm doing whatever I feel like doing, before I reach the age of accountability."

'Is THIS the way you plan to spend your peak learning years?'

"It's a mobile."

"Moses, some of the people are requesting gluten free manna."

"Can you read the part about Job again?"

"We thought this was more realistic."

"I'm Albert, your new mathematics teacher, but you can call me Al."

'You must be Jimmy's father . . .'

The Re-Opening of Schools

"Today in school we learned how to glue!"

'146 days of leadership without any negative press.'

I drive, therefore I am.

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN! "It was mostly okay, but there's way too much micromanagement!"

"It's going to be one of those days."

"If you find authority intolerable, remember, you're in good company."

"I have a feeling this is gonna be one tough course."

SEX EDUCATION, 'It's a crazy idea, but it just might work.'

Learning.