Sunday School Kick-off Gifts

"Can you read the part about Job again?"

Kid at bus stop to kid: 'Needless to say, I cured my Mom of her home-schooling kick.'

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

My First Camera

"And for my next trick. . . turning wine back into water."

Coping with a strong-willed child

"So, what's gonna be your favorite class?"

'Well, Tommy, you've grown a foot since the last time I saw you!'

Today we learned to count to one.

"I know! I know! I K-n-o-w!. . . Um, what was the question?"

"I lost my taste for his homework when it came burned on a CD."

"The day at school? Oh, you know, the usual psychological and educational stew."

'A dog ate my homework.'

"You're never a superhero in your own backyard."

'I'd like to challenge the test.'

'I don't like the sound of the engine.'

"I'm doing whatever I feel like doing, before I reach the age of accountability."

'Is THIS the way you plan to spend your peak learning years?'

"It's a mobile."

"I'm Albert, your new mathematics teacher, but you can call me Al."

"Moses, some of the people are requesting gluten free manna."

"Today in school we learned how to glue!"

"We thought this was more realistic."

'What's the best kind of glue to fix a TV screen?'

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN! "It was mostly okay, but there's way too much micromanagement!"

"It's going to be one of those days."

"As a child of the pastor, did you stop and think that just because you can belch the books of the Bible, should you?"

"If anyone wants me, Ms. Clark, I'll be down in the youth department."

Learning.

'All I wanted to know is if that word was naughty.'

"If you find authority intolerable, remember, you're in good company."

"I have a feeling this is gonna be one tough course."

SEX EDUCATION, 'It's a crazy idea, but it just might work.'

"The children took off their own coats this morning, Pastor."

Jimmy had a very active imagination.