New School Opening Gifts

'We've been struggling to keep up with our rapidly growing enrollment.'

'In school today, we learned about endangered species.'

'I didn't do my homework because I forgot my user name and password.'

'Are you sure I should read my book report to the class? --�It's PG-13.'

'The secret to doing a book report is only picking books that have been made in to movies.'

'But what is the universe for?'

"Sorry. I just find rotating my head helps me to relax during the test."

"So, what's gonna be your favorite class?"

You wrote a book report on a video game instruction manual?

Timmy has a great future in nano-technology.

"I lost my taste for his homework when it came burned on a CD."

" 'How I Spent My Summer Vacation,' a treatment by Todd Mozelle, Grade Three."

Children's education

"This is a great school but it wasn't my first choice."

'What's the best kind of glue to fix a TV screen?'

The Re-Opening of Schools

"We thought this was more realistic."

"I enjoy the one day of the school year...that I didn't forget to do my homework."

"The first day of school. Yes sir. A day to make new friends. A day to mark new beginnings. A day to discover everyone but you has grown three feet over the summer."

"There are days when I wish we'd never agreed to him changing his spots"

"I'm both too liberal to be preppy and too conservative to be trendy."

Child writes letter to Santa reading 'Sorry Santa, I DO want to go to school'.

"The first week of school is just review. You know. Scenes from last year's episode."

Jimmy had a very active imagination.

'I got a good place in my exams today. Right next to the radiator.'

"I'm the last to go home because my parents are still fine tuning their work-life balance."

Always remember...you're the best you in the world.

"Hey, you guys, don't you remember? The big word here is 'compromise.' "

"Rats, I thought he'd like my science project!"

'LOVELY school. But where's the library?' 'What's a library?'

'Due to the record snowfall, every school on the face of the earth is closed except for Wolfbranch Elementary.'

"Welcome."

'How could you flunk multiplication?'

"A laser blaster turns pesky little boys into ferns! Now that would be a cool school supply."

"Nice to have you all back at school, tap-tap, there are lessons to learn."