School Mischief Gifts

"My strength is the strength of ten because I'm fourteen."

'I keep getting leadership mixed up with incitement.'

McMorkim's Cheeses Security A gang of mice wheeling in a giant mousetrap with Pizza and Beer as bait to a Security Guard's post hoping to gain access to a cheese Factory if the Guard is trapped.

'But he qualifies for medicare in dog years.'

The Queen of Static Electricity: 'Hey, Jeffrey...I've got a physics question for you...The queen of static electricity is exempt! Hail me!!'

'I didn't want to get the napkin messy.'

"I couldn't have made my family recipe raisin date nut cake with it's secret ingredient without Jimmy's help."

'Your Honor, my client pleads not guilty by reason of a sugar buzz.'

"How was first grade? I don't know yet. I spent all day in the Principal's office."

"Forget about eating homework, I need you to carry my backpack!"

"We need milk, eggs, bread, cheese. Underline cheese."

"It was a professional hit..."

"It's a note from Eddie's teacher. It seems he's stretched his imagination past the end of her rope."

"My math teacher says I should consider becoming a teacher some day."

"Ms. Thomas, you'll have to come pick up your son. He's swinging from the chandelier claiming that he can and will divide by zero."

'Well if you don't want to see me in here anymore, then tell the teachers to stop picking on my bad behaviour!'

"Don't be fooled. He isn't a prince and he isn't you pal!"

Student to mother: 'What a day. The health teacher left school sick, the debate team got expelled for fighting, the biology teacher dissected the school mascot, and the glee club, in general, went berserk.'

'Who gave you that black eye?'

'It's great to be a ventriloquist. I find that I can still talk in class, but I don't get in trouble.'

"Just think, in dog years we'd be old enough to know better!"

'I got caught cribbing from Charley Jones' laptop!'

"You might fake an illness at home, but here, only a fever makes her a believer."

'Watch out for her. She lets you do all the talking.'

Urine sample

Paul Revere circa 3rd grade.

'I just got off the phone with your teacher. Next time you tell her you're from a 'broken home' don't forget to mention who broke most of it!'

"Baldo, I'm sorry! Tia Carmen's friend Maria left this book here by accident. Silly me, I thought it was yours! Ha ha ha!"

'Boy, when I get tall you'll have to put all of the breakable stuff really high.'

'Mom, Jason is making negative robocalls about me!'

"How long do you think I could get detention for doing this?"

Next year Timmy gets socks for his birthday

'Mom got our cells mixed up again.'

'My lawyer told me to never put anything in writing.'

Two boys pulling faces