School Chums Gifts

'My finger's stopped bleeding. I must have run out of blood.'

Boys in the cloakroom.

Cheers For The Hollyhock Middle School Chess Team

'I made a good grade in creative writing, but I didn't do very well in creative spelling.'

'Kids, today, Xerf brought in a planet that he found. Now if we look at it closely under the microscope, you can still see it's inhabitants scrambling around.'

'I prefer the term 'whistleblower' to tattletale.'

'If history keeps repeating itself, why do I have to repeat this class?'

The Ekert Saga: 'Ah, another week of school begins...might as well try to make the most of it!...You're crampin' my style, Ekert.'

'Hey, man, cool shirt.'

'I reckon we have grounds for a libel action, don't you?.'

'Remember me, Fred? I sat next to you in class and you said I'd never amount to anything.'

'Yes I think we did go to school together. Wasn't you the old headmistress?'

'First semester, you learn the numbers. Second semester, you use them to count the days 'til school is out.'

"Oh well, if you really want to see some scary chest thumping, come with me now and I'll show my school report to my dad..."

Niche Extracurriculars

Teacher's pet dog

'Sorry, Jimmy... our school has a strict 'don't show, don't tell' policy!'

'Don't just stand there, get into focus!'

Say, aren't you my old shop teacher who said I couldn't cut a straight line to save my life?

'I'm bright enough. I just don't have the right connections.'

"You are here, but you should be in class!"

Mr. Bubbles was beginning to regret sending his son off to clown college. 'Is that what they teach you, up at that fancy school of yours?!'

'It's the parents' 4x4x400 metres.'

'What a huge disappointment. I thought French Club was about kissing!'

Friendship.

"Forget about eating homework, I need you to carry my backpack!"

Romeo and Juliet 2.0

'I see you're still copying from other people's papers, Billy.'

"The kindergarteners have breached their classroom confines, and are headed this way. We'll be overrun within minutes. What should we do?"

''My Summer Vacation †the Untold Story'....'