School Friend Gifts

"It's over Rachel - I want your things out of my cubby."

'I see you're still copying from other people's papers, Billy.'

"I was running late, Mr. Morris, so I thought I'd finish my homework while I showered!"

"Why, it's Minnie Manngold! Married 'n' everything."

"If I become President, I'm not giving any of my schoolfriends jobs."

"Gracie, can you find North America on the map, please?"

"God, if you can help me find a seat by my friends, I'll listen to my teachers, do my homework and clean my room..."

'A vet! I had you picked in advertising!'

''My Summer Vacation †the Untold Story'....'

'Well, well, if it isn't Ted Watt in the flesh!'

'I'm bright enough. I just don't have the right connections.'

"Larry, you haven't changed a bit."

"Hello Tim!! - Why, I haven't seen you since school days!!"

"This is Brian. Me and Brian go way back."

Wally Begins research for his thesis entitled "who's a good dog?"

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

Department of Theatre, Film and Television: Lights...Camera...Unemployment!

"I'm going to talk about the summer before last, it was much more fun."

'I got 100 in school today. 50 in history and 50 in maths.'

Yearbook

'May I be excused? I just checked my college investment portfolio online, and I feel sick.'

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

"He said he doesn't want to see me in his office again..."

"Excuse me, Professor. I think I might have spotted a flaw in your theory!"

I was trying to day trade my way through business school, but then the stock market tanked.

'I didn't think of it as someone else writing my term paper, I thought of it more as a guest blogger situation.'

"Professor, we need you to stop. The Student Union has decided that the earth is flat."

'I need to read five books this weekend to graduate - any suggestions?'

'I chose my field on what would put the most impressive initials after my name.'

'Hey, man, cool shirt.'

"We've invented a new word!"

'If history keeps repeating itself, why do I have to repeat this class?'

"This is the fourth student who bubbled in Y-O-U-R N-A-M-E when I told the class to 'bubble in your name'!"

“Today we are going to be learning percentages.”

'This part was tenure.'